The Gen Z Report

The Gen Z Report

Satire

When Coins Can’t Buy Happiness

Even the penguins with all the money in the world aren’t happy

Ben Ulansey's avatar
Ben Ulansey
Nov 26, 2024
∙ Paid
9
1
Share
Photo from Club Penguin

As a young penguin, our family had never been wealthy. We lived in a run down igloo and finances were always a sore point between my mother and father. They were both living paycheck to paycheck. As a child, our idea of eating out was traveling to the local pizza parlor. We never had the money for penguin vacations like so many of…

Keep reading with a 7-day free trial

Subscribe to The Gen Z Report to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.

Already a paid subscriber? Sign in
© 2025 Ben Ulansey
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start writingGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture